Elizabeth Warren To Face Charges For Email Scandal

In an incident horrifyingly reminiscent of that with failed presidential candidate Hillary Clinton, Senator Elizabeth Warren was found sending official government documents through a private account.

Her email—spicywarren@hotmail.com—was searched by FBI agents earlier this week.  Said a suspiciously defensive Warren, “Look, I can’t keep track of all these accounts!  I’ve got Twitter, Facebook, Instagram, a Finsta with my friend Nancy from the grocery store….  How’m I supposed to keep them isolated from my other ones,” slipping into a curious and clearly affected southern accent.

Perhaps most striking was Warren’s correspondence with one “carlos_danger” on a Tinder account set up with the personal email.  According to the FBI, the two exchanged “questionable personal and thus-far unreleased images.”  Nudes?  We can only guess…

What the FBI did release was a conversation with this “carlos_danger” from the night before the investigation began:


Said a disgruntled Jim Henson—the Senator’s former contact at Goldman Sachs and current bathhouse custodian—”Serves her right!”  Indeed, Jim.  Indeed.

This is just another classic example of liberals taking advantage of their power, pursuing personal pleasure at the taxpayer’s expense.  It’s disgusting.  And it needs to stop.

Perhaps we will never know what Warren meant by these indiscretions.  But what is certain is that she lacks the respect for her post, for her constituents, and for the government of the United States of America.  And in that way, she is a terrorist.

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