The Latest from Salman Rushdie: “The Golden House” reviewed

“The Golden House”, recently published by Random House (coincidence?), is Salman Rushdie’s attempt at writing a great American novel. The book, rather his thirteenth attempt at one, features many characters and takes place in New York and Mumbai. Now, I’m going to be honest with you, that is really all I know about it. You see, I never actually finished reading the fucker. It was … Continue reading The Latest from Salman Rushdie: “The Golden House” reviewed

Books: Weapons of the Enemy?

Since the beginning of time, books have been used to confuse and manipulate the weak and the simple-minded. Take the Bible, for example.  It is and has always been the worldwide best-seller.  Why?  Is the writing particularly good?  Any fourth-grader will tell you otherwise.  Does it elicit any sense of self-understanding or emotional enlightenment?  Clearly not. And yet it continues to fill the pockets of … Continue reading Books: Weapons of the Enemy?

Memoir: High School Football

My sophomore year in high school I tried out for football.  After the first practice, most of the boys said, “Who’s the fairy?”  And I was like, “No, dudes, I’m one of you!  I’m playing football!”  Soon I learned from the coaches that my only duty was to bring down the water jugs before practice and bring them back up after practice.  So I decided … Continue reading Memoir: High School Football

Review: The Embarrassment of President Trump

In an article published in the New Yorker a couple weeks ago, author Jeffrey Frank makes slanderous and outrageous attacks on our president, the Honorable Donald J. Trump, Esquire. Mr. Frank first pokes fun at Trump’s physical appearance.  He implies that his eyes and hair are somehow unfitting of a president.  Oh, ha ha Jeff.  Very funny.  Somehow I’m reminded of all those times when you and your liberal … Continue reading Review: The Embarrassment of President Trump

BREAKING NEWS: Anthropologists Determine True Authors Of Bible

Anthropologists from the University of Colorado Boulder found evidence early Friday morning indicating that the true authors of the Old Testament—known to those in the Jewish community as the Tanakh—were, in fact, operating under pseudonyms. Traces of writing were found on stones under several layers of silt and sediment in the West Bank of Palestine.  According to literary experts, the writings suggest a clear and intentional plot outline … Continue reading BREAKING NEWS: Anthropologists Determine True Authors Of Bible

BREAKING: Candy Man Can’t

Reports Sunday night surfaced on the popular web forum “Reddit” that in fact, contrary to popular belief, the Candyman, in fact, can’t. The claims were made by user “MikeT1984” on the Willy Wonka sub-Reddit. Efforts to contact user MikeT1984 were unsuccessful. A post has been made to Facebook in the hopes of contacting one MikeT1984 regarding his knowledge of the matter. According to his user edits, MikeT1984 … Continue reading BREAKING: Candy Man Can’t

Harry Potter and American Politics

Over the course the last several weeks, I have been on a bit of a personal journey, re-reading all of my favorite books and series from my childhood. My most recent series was a classic, a group of books that nearly every person I know has read: Harry Potter. As I was reading, it happened upon me: Harry Potter is a literary representation of the American … Continue reading Harry Potter and American Politics